Wednesday, 24 May 2023

I Love My Body

 


Yes it’s true. It is not pretty.

The middle is too fat.

My neck is too thick.

My eyes are droopy.

The corners of my mouth curl down


I see this every day.


I cannot walk without support.

Slowly I tell my left leg

lift up, move forward a few inches

and it reluctanctly will do an inch.


I have a diagnosis that’s complicated.

Non pressure Hydrocephalus

There is no cure

but it sounds aristocratic, special, unusual

— it makes me feel unique


It’s not Alzeimer’s

not Parkinson’s

its the body I was born with

but worn out

resentful of my demands

after all my brain decided

it wanted a divorce from my body

and now

hurt and resentful

it tries to ignore me


but I still love it

still need it

has been with me since conception

within my mother’s womb


Thank you Mum for teaching me

to care for my body

how I dress it

how it appears to others

how it needs posture

loves to have a bath

loves to be fed and watered.


Some years ago there were gifts

and pleasures.


This body carried three children

and now

I have four grand-children.


I remember walks in the forest

my body taking me down

trails by fir and decidious trees

their perfume, their shade

their strong trunks and hidden roots


my body 

walking 

one foot in front

of the other


this body also went on a couple of cruises

down the Danube, Italy, Sweden

flew to London where it was born


It has been on protest marches

climbed mountains

swam in the River Thames

and Lake Huron


I love all those bodies 

who cared for the land before I arrived

and who will care for as long

as their bodies live.


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